♥ EILEEN

i really miss you.

2010-11-26T14:50:00.002+08:00

Kong wei, I was browsing thru our past juz now. All I can say now is im sorry. I really luv you. So much that I got jealous so easily. I really want you by my side. I can tell you life without u is meaningless. I feel whenever Im walking arnd in shopping centre, Im a friggin zombie, a lifeless soul. You know how this feeling hurts? You know how sad Im when I know what you said to benji? You know how much hope I have in you. You know till now I still want you back. My feelings for you cant be juz put in words. Up till now I still hope and pray that you will be back. I still believe in it. But I dint want to say it out bcoz Im afraid that that will nv come. I really need you. I feel like dying at this min, but im juz too afraid of death, if death can prove to you how much i luv you. Im willing to do it. I dont know what else can I say now. I love you. I'll nv forget abt us.I'll try my best to let you go. Bcoz i love you.

Find me there alright ?

2009-09-17T22:04:00.003+08:00

I'm moving, but this blog wil stay due to 2 reason ;

The spammer(youre v welcome here, i wont post here but i'll reply your tags ^^)
my personal reason(this blog wil be deleted once i let go of everything, too much of memories here)

Goodbye ppl, catch me @ my private blog :B

Love is jus a game

2009-09-14T21:07:00.004+08:00

Anjie said " luv is jus a game, its a matter on how well you can play." Well, to me i think luv aint jus a game. Its the feeling & devotion that counts, playing is indeed part of luv. Its to test how much your luver luv you. But every luv got their limit, no luv last forever. This is for sure, but how long can it last is a test how much youre willing to give in. Quarrels do bring couples closer, but too much of unnecssary quarrels made us fade apart, each time the quarrel get more heated situation had change. When forced to the corner, ill choose to give up & learn to let go. Giving it all up, learning how to let go, move on for the future is an art. Not everyone can give up their luv, let it go & move on. Rather not stuck in the past, i chose to let go & wait till the day comes. Luv is abt how much you give & take, if you cnt even stand at you luver's position & think for them. You got no rights to talk abt luv, time will prove everything- how strong this luv is. Youre totally changed, youd change to someone i cant entrust my life to you anym, someone whos a complete stranger to me. I do miss the past when i was treated as a queen. My feelings for you were god damn real & it dint fade, but id chosen another way to luv. You might think its all bullshit, but one day you'll come to understand why. Jus rmb, i told you- everything i do is for your good. Since you doesnt want to care, i dont see a need for me to care. All the best, my luv.

wakeupat6>busdtosch>mt=boringbutfun:B>physics&maths=slp>recess>english=crap^^>history=bullshit>afterschool>

busdhome>slack>meetfriends=study^^v>home=blogging&facebooking

Gotta go tiongbahru tmr=study! But im tired, really no mood to go anym. I need a lot of motivations, i dont see a need in anyt anym. All is jus put up for a show, I gotta stay strong, move on. ^^

best regards

2009-09-13T21:50:00.004+08:00

wakeup=tv>trybakeeggtarts=disaster>aftermath,cleanvin'skitchen-.->slack=chitchat(blahblahblah)>bus-d ws=shopping&slack>home

Jay's eyes are perfectly fine now, those things tht were found on his body wasnt fleas nor ticks. Its jus normal bugs tht bite on jays body. Jay seems happy today, running around happily C: The bug look like some greenbean and thankfully for Mr xxxxxx he kill them with bare hands eeeeeew :x

Im so in to baking & cooking nowadays, if i manage to bake and cook a proper meal ill treat everyone ^^ Dont get too excited, only those in my name list will get to eat. Hehehehe y.y Tmr start school alr, kinda shag :C Well, i gotta study hard for my end of year examination & ill pass with flying colours :D Rmb to congrats me, alright ? & I found a job to passtime for my yearend hols, i can earn money while passing time. Good idea right ? ^^ Okay, goodnight. Prepare for tmr, a new start. Byebye ! ^^

* rmb to bring thermometer tmr, if i not wrong :$

Hello

2009-09-12T18:21:00.002+08:00

xiaovin's house blogging, facebooking,msning
well, woke up @ 9am- wanted to find my long lost friend:C >slack with friend=chitchat>Blahblahblah>went to vin's house=groom my son( dint know that he learn grooming too uh, indeed my best buddy)> most probably baking cake ltr=surprise ^^& i was told that i got a bigbigbig surpise ltr too =x
My jayboy is sick agn :( gotta visit vet tmr, hopefully got some kind soul accompany me tmr.
*I got a job interview (!) Cheers p.p

Mummy luvvvvv you

2009-09-10T17:12:00.000+08:00

Night cycling tonight, will be back to update ltr.
My dearest Jayjay, mummy luv you.

Im back!

2009-09-07T21:06:00.000+08:00

Hello, im back (!) kinda busy nowadays, tmr gotta go school>tiongbahru ( tired+lazy) spent my whole day @ bi's hse, currently having some moodswings idk why. I seriously need to smoke.

Prince of my dream

2009-09-02T21:19:00.003+08:00

I wna be like this barbie doll, able to wear my grown & mary the man who deserve it.

Life is as normal, well. This my last post, I'll be back after weeks/months. Gotta depends, maybe spending this time on my studies. Cheers my friends. I'll rmb what you'd done for me ^^ I need a lot time, this is my weakest time in life. Thankyou for standing by me. All my stress will be gone soon, i believe x.x Be that man, stand by me. Hold me when i fall.

I'll Be Back.

Let time proves

2009-08-30T13:45:00.006+08:00

wokeupat12pm>talkonphone>comp>playwithjayboy>textingfriends=phonebill>talkonphone&comp>eating>comp=facebook+blogging>

slack=talkingabtrelationship>home>(?)

Im sorry, i cant move on this fast. I need sometime, will you wait for me?My past led to future imperfections. You know my luv for you. I really really need protection more than the other girls. Im so lacked of protection & security.

Edited @7.09: had a talk with friend, He's stressed up. Hope things will be fine for him uh. After talking to him I finally know wht I want of a boyfriend.

My Ideal Boyfriend:

Know what i want ( without me saying)
Gimme surprises
Super ultra sweet to ME only
Protect me & lemme feel safe & secure
Give in to me
Gentle
Lemme feel loved
&&&&& I luv hugs

I wna watch final destionation today, hopefully everything goes on well ^^

Long lasting luvvv

2009-08-29T19:48:00.003+08:00

woke up@ 10>bus-d ws>atm=withdraw $>train-d bugis=shop&walk>train-d pasir ris>slack>home
super tired today :(

Today's kinda boring, walking arnd singapore. Im saving up! $$$$$$$$$ is all i want. I feel so lacked of $$$ lohhhh. Saving $ is my hobby, earning $ is my interest. Hahaha, living in the world of $. I believe tmr will be a beautiful day. I think i kinda neglect my studies, will be going study w smeone. I wna eat mac shaker fries (!) Final destination, im coming ^^

The sweetest in you melts me down,
i need protection as much as other girls.
Secure & protected ^^

Penny of thoughts

2009-08-28T22:57:00.005+08:00

bus-d school>silent reading=eat chocolates+ss results^^ >history=great results>English=pass&reported sick>D&T=test>went home early>bus-d home>relax>went out meet mr xx>bus-d school=meet benji>bus-d bishan=daydreaming>took beyond van>bishan park=3.3km run :C>took beyond van>back to J8>arcade=that pig is cute i want it (!)>slack>bus-d home>home -.-

Thanks alot for the watch C:
luvvvv&missesssss

Cinderalla story

2009-08-26T18:21:00.002+08:00

bus-d to school>silent reading-slept>dnt-chiong my artefact(i think its nice)>physics-test(i think i gna fail)>recess>maths-daydreaming>chemistry-slept>general office>219>math test-cfm fail>general office>bus-d home>giant-almost kena bang by car, beggar saved my life>home>blog>will be studying later

I broke off with kongwei bcos i dont luv him & im interested in another guy.
Im so stressed, v stress. Fuckit(!) :C

^^

2009-08-25T23:32:00.007+08:00

School>SS-copynotesalltheway>MT-test&sleep>Maths(freeperiod)-gossiping>Recess-slack>EL(free period)-Slack,gossip,talk to mr ong,talk to bona>Lifeskills-report sick>School End>219-meet bi>went bi's house>bus-d WS>Train-d Tiongbahru>Counseling-studying>Mac(dinner)>Train-d pasir ris>slack>bus-d home>home ^^ Tdy's a vvvvvv boring day v.v

I gna make sure he'll deserve what he deserved.This is what he'd done, dont blame me (!)I HATE THAT PIG. Wahlao, sec 2 only. Kaiwen(PIG) He's super step okay(!) C: People, if he goes to you wna FF with you, heck him. If he say how great he's, he mus be joking with you. Bcos, no matter what rmb this: He's jus a useless,lousy pig ^^

Hubby, iluvyou(!) Only when im with you i feel secure. Thanks for everything you'd done for me. I'll try my best to trust you again. I believe we'll be tgt forever :D Our lil promise : marry @ the age of 18. Now, i trust you. She's jus a pathetic sub, she's nothing.

Curses & Swears

2009-08-24T22:25:00.007+08:00

Greenview secondary school, i swear is not a place for me.It's a biased, disgusting school. @.@

!@#$%^&*()&$ Thinking back, why did i choose this sch ?.?

Back thn, i was a young & innocent girl. C: Bcos of one teacher, he changed me ^^Now, c'mon lah teachers. I wont trust any of you, all cover backsides liars. :P So much to say lohhh =x && im not the only one having this kind of prob. I admit i couldnt control my temper that well compared to others. But, the way school is handling things is too gross for me. ~.~

I'll go to a better school next year, with my deardear. ^^v

Off you go, disgusting fellows(!) I curse the school to close down lohhhh. Wahahaha (!)

School>219>school for detention & I'll nv go for detention ever again>219>school to lodge a complain>219> bus stop, walk past eddie bi scold him. He's super duper ultra hum okay> slack>Police station>whitesands, library & buy present for my mummy>dinner>home

Tmr will be a btr day, jus wake up look into the mirror & say" GOODMORNING & SMILE "

Everymorning will be a better day C: The sun'll still be shining up high. The god'll bless those with a kind heart. To the devils, you guys wont be happy as you got devilish plan in mind. Wake up thinking how to makan ppl. Devils in disguise, trying to act one nice guy. Ha, gross much. Pigs (!)

Bi, i luv you. Thanks for being there for me when I need you. Sorry to kept you waiting the whole day. I'll make it up for you ok, Friday we'll catch a movie & my whole day'll be yours alright.

Crazy over $$

2009-08-23T22:51:00.002+08:00

Woah, wake up @ 10am.
meet bi>bugis>whitesand>slack & study>home.
Went to bugis, meet shiping.
Spent $30, my heartaches :C
Train-d back pasir ris,
bi shop for storybook for approx 30 mins.
This is the every first time im so pissed off in popular.
Normally im the one wasting my whole day idling there @.@
Fine, Slack under a block.
Fed the strays, theyre so hungry.
Poor dogs ._.
Im so proud of myself, ^^
studying diligently for days.
Today done 2 chapters for chemistry.
Totally done 5 chapter of notes for chemistry.

Its true that quarrels bring couple closer,
allows us to know each other better.
(*) Im vvvv crazy over $,
when im thinking abt $ i cnt help but laugh. $.$
Im saving up for my future ^^v

Bi, i (L) you.

Unstable Emotions

2009-08-22T16:02:00.003+08:00

Now, the period of unstabilty.
So stress, my personal life & schoolwork.
EndOfYear is getting nearer, unable to catch up for maths :C
Its too difficult,
My combined science seems to drop too.
Always getting A1 w/o studying for it.
Now getting A2, fuckit(!)
I dontknow what i really want in life.
No ambitions, no aims.
Too many stress can break one down.

Vin'shouse>bake>eat>home>blogging>studying

My baking sucks,

Ganache looks like some weird cake compared to vin's.

Praises to Vin's cake ^^

Wanted to give you a try on my first attempt of baking.

But it sucks full time.

Decided to give it another try after I'd done my research on baking.

Now i know how difficult to bake a cake.

Thanks for the brownies, kongwei.

Boy, you make me wna know you btr.

Stressful

2009-08-21T22:13:00.003+08:00

school>215>detention>kongwei'shouse>marineparade>home

EndOfYear Examinations is coming,
and im panicking.
CHEER FOR ME, PEOPLE(!)

Hello

2009-08-19T09:40:00.002+08:00

Went to school, gave my dnt presentation board to jireh
went hme sleep :D
LEEYUANYUAN help me w my dnt artefact(!)
Thanks alot :D
Aloysia, my secretary keep me well informed w hw.
Thanks alot :D
wake up>eat>wentout>slack>wenthme>computer>study
Thanks alot my friends (!)
Im going for a jog tmr, 3km ^^
cheer for me kids,
im super tired nowadays.
~~super not enough slp.~~
Studying hard now, tmr got chem test.
Acid & Bases, Salts.
study for it, classmates

Edited/9.52pm:
i wna eat cake!
i gna learn hw to bake cake & cookies.
To everyone: cherish those arnd you (*)
&&& lil things you do leave an impression.
be it good or bad.
even a post-it note, trust me.
It's luv

2009-08-18T22:13:00.000+08:00

I need a hug ~
actions>words

M.I.A

2009-08-17T21:35:00.000+08:00

(*) Ppl, i'm leaving my blog alone.
will post when i'm free :D

went out daily, had extremely greatgreat fun(!)

1234567890

2009-08-14T00:02:00.000+08:00

I'M CONFUSED.

im super bored!

2009-08-10T21:44:00.003+08:00

imsuperbored!^^V imsuperbored!^^V imsuperbored!^^V imsuperbored!^^V

Spent my whole day doing my project @ my hse nearby,

wokeup>shower>sleep>wokeup>cleanmyrm>wentoutstudy>wenthme

finally done my dnt presenttion board. So marvellous, i think it's beautiful C:

I wna watch the coming up movie ^^

My dearest bi, will you bring me go ? i'm so frustrated!(*)

I feel so uncomfortable, damn the sorethroat'fever'cough'flu.

Tmr need to go sch alrdy, shag-d im lazy :S

Lemme plan my day tmr, shall be happy (!)

My throat hurts alot ~

Damn it(!)

Happy 44th Birthday

2009-08-09T14:01:00.002+08:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY,SINGAPORE!

ppl, i'm gng ndp ltr.

will be back with pictures :D

edited/12.16am :

i'mvconfusedddddd~i'mvconfusedddddd~i'mvconfusedddddd~i'mvconfusedddddd~i'mvconfusedddddd~i'mvconfusedddddd~

went for ndp, i dint take any photo :( but tdy memories will be etched.

Nice fireworks. super sweet and romantic.

The goodie bag was cool, the atmosphere was right.

I'm so in the mood,

&&&& i saw B W LAM thr^^ doing his duty. (surprised)

after ndp went to mc eat, went hme.

Someone did smt vvvv romantic ahhhh :D he wna touched me.

Eileen's sick.

COUGH,FLU,FREQUENT FEVER.^^>

Zzzzz, i dont wna fall sick sia(!)

May god bless me >.<

Lets party(!)

2009-08-08T12:27:00.003+08:00

eeeee.
my dearest ppl, i'm gng out(!)
i'll be back to finish my post (:

edited/3.28am:

went to meet vivian @ ws
head-d to t1. brought my hairband.
train-d bck pasir ris meet smeone.
SLACK + ARGUE.
went to meet sam take my things
went to coffee express eat dinner ( saw one extremely handsome boy)
meet kw under his house
back hme put hings
cab-d vivian's hse
slack
cab-d hme
meet kw under my house
slack until now

Too late to apologise

2009-08-08T00:08:00.003+08:00

1.Find a guy who calls you beautiful instead of hot, who calls you back when you hang up on him, who will lie under the stars and listen to your heartbeat, or will stay awake just to watch you sleep... wait for the boy who kisses your forehead, who wants to show you off to the world when you are in sweats, who holds your hand in front of his friends, who thinks you' re just as pretty without makeup on. One who is constantly reminding you of how much he cares and how lucky he is to have YOU... The one who turns to his friends and says, thats her.

2.The couple that fights the most is the one most in love... it shows they care enough to notice the other one screwed up and care enough to mention it to the person so they can fix it. When you stop fighting it means you stopped caring.

3.We are all a little weird and life's a little weird, and when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall in mutual weirdness and call it love.

4.Love is never wanting to lose faith, never wanting to give up, and never truly moving on. Love is knowing and praying in the deepest part of what's left of your heart that they feel the same.

5.The soul mate is what we aspire to and like to understand about us, is what we deem to be perfection, purity and endless regarding our own being.

6.Women wish to be loved not because they are pretty, or good, or well bred, or graceful, or intelligent, but because they are themselves.

7.What I needed most was to love and to be loved, eager to be caught. Happily I wrapped those painful bonds around me; and sure enough, I would be lashed with the red-hot pokers or jealousy, by suspicions and fear, by burst of anger and quarrels.

8.LOVE: We think about it, Sing about it, Dream about it && Lose sleep worrying about it. When we don't know we have it, we search for it. When we discover it, we don't know what to do with it. When we have it, we fear loosing it. It is the constant source of pleasure and pain. But we don't know which it will be from one moment to the next. It is a short word, easy to spell, difficult to define && IMPOSSIBLE to live without.

9. Love - a wildly misunderstood although highly desirable malfunction of the heart which weakens the brain, causes eyes to sparkle, cheeks to glow, blood pressure to rise and the lips to pucker.

10. What can the love in my soul be compared to another wonderful soul which is so far and yet so close of my self? What can this symbiosis between two souls can be? What can love be when you feel you cannot sleep at night, that every drop of dew becomes a crystal in your heart, when every breeze of wind has magical meanings? What can love be when you feel that you want nothing more in this world that to be with the soul you love? But what can love be in other transcendental realities? What about our souls? Are our souls a waterfall, a true Niagara or a smile, a flirt of an angel? Are our souls a mere mood of a fairy or a lightening in a summer rain?Our souls could be all of this and much more. But what really happens in that transcendental reality when we feel we are truly in love, that we love so much that it hurts? That the air in the room is unbreathable, that the sentimental, spiritual or physical distances kill us? What happens when dawn find us sadder than ever, looking for an excuse or an argument for the person we love so much, our Great Love? What are all thses? What are the looks lost in the desert horizons of unfulfilment or those in the eyes that deeply loose each other in the others inside the souls?
< my dearest friend, jiahao. thanks for this long long shit. now i understand >

i learnt to be wiser^^
luv doesnt mean need,
wht's impt to hold on,
wht's not impt to let go.
staying in the past will not be happy.
to have not to hold.
once in a lifetime luv,
rmb, not to live in it

To: my dearest friend

2009-08-07T22:42:00.001+08:00

Manage to make my wish tdy.
but i was on my own :)
countdwn for it, vvv excited.
i jus this wish thingy is fake, my wish dint came true.
in fact, all gone ):

met germaine and kaiyu outside sch,
smoke-d. saw mr ong, went to have lunch with him.
after tht took bus 5, germaine went hme.
i went to meet jiaqing @ bedok.
thn he bring me go his hse nearby eat agn.
(i took a ride on his bike, grabbing him tightly)
His bike was wonderful vvvv pretty.
thn slack until 6+++
he ask me want go anywhr not,
i told him my plan, wanted to go tamp buy thing.
w/o thinking twice he ask me to hop on.
he's super nice right.
GIRLS GRAB HIM BEFORE ITS TOO LATE!
after tht he sent me to meet benson & celestine,
thn sent me hme agn, he's super nice.
will upload photos tmr.
too ~~lazy~~ ler, super tired.

*jiaqing, thanks alot for tdy.
my 7yrs friend.

Make your wish come true(!)

2009-08-06T23:28:00.000+08:00

12:34:56/07.08.09

Fate.

2009-08-06T21:30:00.002+08:00

Bi, iluvyou.
i dint found the thing i want to buy.
shaggggg, tmr gng shop for it agn.
i'm not motivated to go to school.
sleeping @ hme, gng out with bi seems mre interesting.
Train-d to tiongbahru,
Fk it, i playing my psp game ( midnight club)
i play one race frm pasir ris-tiongbahru.
i keep lose, fk lohhh.
I STUDIED FOR 2 HRS TODAY @ TIONGBAHRU.
make notes for chpt 1&2 physics
tmr gng study with my bi @ his hse.
i'mhardworking.
EOY coming soon sia, can feel the pressure.
i'm motivated to study, but not to sch.
I'm kinda of happy tdy :)

i'll always luvv you.

2009-08-05T23:20:00.000+08:00

Blogger sucks, decided to post in live journal

I'm super happy tonight.

2009-08-02T22:55:00.001+08:00

My life would suck without you!
Super duper ultra sick, need smeone to take care of me ~~seriously~~
done revising for my coming test, hw. relaxing whole day.
slept for 16 hrs. feel so energetic now.
Tmr school starts, super shag!
i'm lazy to go school, rly feel like slacking thruout.
thr's a surprise for me after school.
wonder good or bad.

Lousy day, stupid life

2009-07-31T15:26:00.003+08:00

FUCK IT SIA, I'm FEELING SO DAMN UNWELL.
VISIT MY LIVEJOURNAL :D
Get well soon, kids!
I'm ~~happy~~

Happy 17 month anniversary!

2009-07-25T15:31:00.002+08:00

REFER TO MY LIVEJOURNAL
Bi, i luv you!

Back to blogging :D

2009-07-19T16:52:00.004+08:00

It'd been a week i think i last post.
Back to my blogging mood tdy :D
14July2009
as per normal.
15,16 July2009
went to tiongbahru after school,
wasted my whole day thr.
seriously; i hate t be @ thr.
i cnt finish my hw on time,
& super rush !
after school straight need to train-d dwn
after the whole thing by the time i reach-d hme
its abt 8pm.
gotta bath & stuffs.
jus dont like it rush
17 July2009
went to watch harry potter with counselor.
Jahan, Kongwei, Reuben, Benson, Benji.
We reach thr super late,
bcos of the stupid train.
well, in the end we watch it.
Free movie tickets, popcorns & drinks.
The movie suck! to the max!
esp the ending.
went hme after it.
more details abt it (?)
ask me personally.
HAD GREAT FUN (!)
18July2009
stay-d @ home but meanwhile
bibi is by myside.
chatting w. me, i can sense him.
19July2009
super bored lahhh,
done all my hw.
slacking & watching my tv @ hme.
prepared for tmr.
Shit, NOT DONE WITH MY D&T PRESENTATION BOARD (!)
or rather, idk hw to use tht dumb programme.

enjoying my perfect life,
dont come & destroy my happiness.
i'll kill you

needed you, not thr.

2009-07-13T18:10:00.009+08:00

I'm not mentally prepared.
I'm stress, real stress.
Consecutive problems.

I'm breaking down.

Why mus this happen.
I'll nv forget you, girl.
& i'll nv forgive you, ass.

Edited/8.24pm:

A child unable to see her dad for the last time,
it's a sin, tht the dad committed.
How much ties, all lies.
The man out thr who committed this sin,
will nv be forgiven by her mummy & her.
She'll use her very last breath to curse him.
In heaven, She'll look @ him see all tortures he's undergoing.
He'll nv be bliss, he'd let dwn the woman who loves him.
Let down the poor child who yearns to see her father,
wanted to feel her father one last time.
Until the very end, the father failed to be thr.
She died before birth.
It's a sin you committed, god'll punish you.
rmb this in your heart, you'll be curse.
whn you slp @ night, thr's someone staring at you.
you'll recieve double the mother & child endure.
Mental & physical tortures.
Hereby, I, EILEENTANMEILING curse tht man.

( posted on behalf of a friend )

Time to stop

2009-07-12T12:16:00.005+08:00

STUDY HARD !
woke up @ 8am plus.
apply medicine for jay.
MY KIDNEY STILL HURTS ALOT !
couldnt walk well :(
well, i think i bite my tongue last night whn i was soundly asleep :D
this morning my tongue hurts alot too :(
cook maggie ate it as my breakfast.
walk jayjay & saw vin walking his brown dog.
hahaha ! head-d hme for my homework.
Tons of hw, finally completed.
Now i gotta revise for tmr chi test.
my first time revising for chi test sia,
all the diff words. damn!
after revising i'll start to prepare notes for my EOY examinations.
vvvv guai right, i knw :D

(*) will be back to update the other half of the day.
CLICKCLICK

Goodbye, my luv.

2009-07-10T22:49:00.007+08:00

you failed to stop me crying,
failed to hold me back.
now it's time for me to move on,
for someone better.
no matter how much i love you,
the extent that i could endure
was perhaps just up to this point.

(*) edited/1.27am: thanks terry, bcos of you i knw i'm not alone.
i'll stay strong, hold on. thanks my dearest mr tan, &&&
WONG YUN WEI ! :)
(!) edited/11.7.2009, 8.21pm : (*) CLICK FOR MORE DETAILS

Fucked up (!)

2009-07-09T22:56:00.001+08:00

I JUS WNA LEAD MY OWN HAPPY LIFE.
a life w/o stress, unhappiness tht difficult ?
well, maybe perhaps no fated to be.

Where did my flawless love go?

2009-07-08T20:34:00.002+08:00

Tuesday
went hme after school,
bring jay dwn slack with bi.
had a nice chat i suppose.
Wednesday, today
went to bi's hse after school,
bi cook alot for me.
pizza, fried chicken pieces & dk wht :D
he wna feed me well & fat.
thn bi's elder brother brought a girl hme too.
after tht we went ws to buy my presentation board for dnt,
&&&& i cnt stop buying pens.
I CANT STAND THE SIGHT OF HER,
I WONDER HOW LONG CAN I TOLERATE.
life is btr now i guess,
though unhappy memories do flash back.
@ least he knw hw to hold me back & cheer me up.

Happily with you :DDDDD

2009-07-06T21:50:00.006+08:00

REFER TO MY LIVEJOURNAL :D
CLICK

IMY :)

2009-07-03T21:41:00.002+08:00

Malacca tmr,
bibi & jayjay. i gna miss both of you (:
hubby, i luv you. Jayjay, mummy luv you too!
Both of you btr behave whn i'm not here ok!
I'll get both of you a present, wait for my presents :D
WARNING(!) : KONGWEI YOU BTR TAKE GOOD CARE OF MY JAYBOY,
IF NOT I GNA KILL YOU COOK CURRY EAT!
I'll be back on sunday.
Monday goat farm with hubby,
looking forward for it :DDDDD

LIVINGMYLIFETOTHEMAX

2009-06-30T18:55:00.003+08:00

CLICK

I'm doubting my love

2009-06-29T21:14:00.003+08:00

School was great except for her lahhhh,
the sight of her rly turns me off man(!)
she fking step, be it pretty, cute, lian.
ohhhmytian lahhh! PEA-BRAINED GIRL.
Well, she a pain in my ass.
She's making my eye sore.
Damn her, fking attention seeker.
SCREAM & SHOUT (!)
( machiam kena raped )

Well, enough of her.
my day was so-so lahhhh,
i starting to doubt my love sia,
will you do smt to make me hold on ?
497 days, bliss or suffer idk.

FAMILY OUTING (!)

2009-06-26T20:57:00.003+08:00

I'm super duper happy today (!)
refer to my livejournal for more details

So won't you try as hard as you can
To put my broken heart together again
blissfully attached to kongwei for 494 days

TWENTYFIVE,FEB,ZEROEIGHT

2009-06-25T16:04:00.016+08:00

16th month anniversary
Fuck it!
Fking angry & disappointed tdy !
supposing to go sci centre & explore
in the end quarrel, fk sia
nvm, i swear not to plan things with him anym.
aint gng celebrate any anniversary anym.
forever lidat, spoilt my mood thn apologise.
getitright bitch, I AINT GOING PLAN ANYMORE THINGS.

Well, i'm done with my hw :D
vvvvvv happy !
i want extend holiday (!)

Jayboy stay strong!

2009-06-24T21:29:00.006+08:00

tmr is our 16th month anniversary
bi, i love you.
jay boy went to vet the third time this wk,
given new medicine for his eyes.
surgery is still an option,
eyes aint getting btr,
but his condition dint worsen.
i believe he'll get well soon w/o any surgery.
i dont want see him suffer like this,
my heart aches.
next monday 29/06 gotta bring him for a review.
jayboy stay strong, mummy love you
you'll recover soon!

looking forward for tmr,
going to have a hair cut & trip to sci centre.
hahaha, my dearest boyf ;
thanks for being thr for me past few days.
sorry for giving you midnight & early morning calls :D
nightmares and jayboy are stressing me now,
i got no choice but to give you a call.
thanks for answering them & accompany me.

hubby, i love you.
blissfully attached to kongwei for 492 days

2009-06-23T23:01:00.003+08:00

Jayboy had been visiting vet for 2 consecutive days & he'll be visiting the vet tmr.
Hope tht he'll recover w/o surgery,
he's still young.

i can give up everything for jayboy

damn it.

2009-06-22T23:04:00.002+08:00

NOT IN THE MOOD,
MY JAYBOY IS VVVV SICK :(

I WNA BE HAPPY FOREVER

2009-06-21T20:30:00.008+08:00

20th june 2009

meet jahan early 12pm @ ws
train-d to tiong bahru
jahan almost kena bang by taxi car plate 5071, trans cab
& i save his life :D
thn went to sembawang park for family day
4 activities there,
first we played marble thingy
vvvv fun jahan is a gentleman
2nd we play smt which required to be blind folded
jahan sacrifice himself & save me
3rd twister, both of us dint take park
4th smack the ball,
accidently kena my head :(
thn build sand castle,
but both of us were digging for water :D
having great fun.
van-d to sembawang beyond branch for bbq
ate alot alot.
bi waited for me @ tiongbahru for hours
sorry uhhh (*)
train-d back to pasir ris,
i'm tired.
vvvv tired.

bi acting pathetic

retarded jahan

jahan sleeping soundly on bus

castle we built

the hole we digged

loner

the hole we dug

enthusiastic jahan

the snail i draw on the sand,
jahan say its ugly :(

21 june 2009
send jayboy to bi for grooming
went hme slept until evening
had dinner with family @ wp
fetch jayboy frm bi under my hse,
his new haircut was a complete failure :(
meet tris @ ws
went popular to buy stationary
he send me hme on his bike
scary :S

before grooming

after grooming

enjoy the happiness now
& suffer with the bitterness ltr on

19 june 2009

2009-06-20T00:48:00.002+08:00

woke up @ 10am,
met jahan & big head @ 11am ( supposingly )
train-d to tiongbahru, as normal.
reach thr supposed to pack rice
but a change in plan,
we went arnd singaporeto buy things & collect things as community service
well, jahan & big head is lame!
pathetic lahhhhh
i got alot of big head photo
but(!) i cant blog it lah.
train-d bck pasir ris meet hubby
play swing @ the pasir ris town park.
thn walk hme with gigi,momo,hubby & jahan.
(*) jahan is quite a gentleman
settled momo but currently sme problems arise :(
i miss my hubby nw.
going for family with beyond.
will be having bbq @ night.
hahaha! me & jahan is in luck tmr :D

bi love you, muack(!)
blissfully married to my hubby, mr kong for 487 days.

Hold on, boy

2009-06-18T18:50:00.007+08:00

Hubby, i'm sorry.
i dont knw tht you skipped sch for me,
sorry for leaving you alone @ hme
& went farmway with tris.

NOTHING ABT TRIS WILL BE BLOGGED TDY.
met bi 2.30pm @ his hse.
slept awhile bcos bi still tired.
went to ikea @ 4.30pm
i help bi wear shirt & pants.
he was wearing boxer (*) so dont misunderstand.
most man dont wear shirt @ hme :D
saw some schoolmates @ ikea.
shopped & play through kinda fun.
hubby kneel @ the bus stop thr dno for wht,
make me so embarrassed.
went for dinner @ ikea
&&&& it cost $20 !
but worth it lahhh,
the food v nice & delicious.
went hme @ 6.30pm

( doggy bibi )

(bibi cover his face with dk wht)

there's time limit for this love,
c'mon try your best.
blissfully attached to my boy,kongwei for 486 days

Finally, i believe love in first sight.

2009-06-17T21:02:00.002+08:00

Hubby cme to fetch me @ 7.30am
went for breakfast thn meet jahan & rueben
headed for old folks hme.
damned ! i'm so angry!
i lost my ear piece :(
well, not the worst.
mopped the floor, serve the elderlys, played with them
& wash plates.
cant tarhan sia!
jahan help me alot today :D
Hahahahaha,
rueben gimme me earpiece (!)
Thy are the best man only earth.
slack with rueben thn anjie come.
& anjie left..
waitied for hubby until 4pm +
thn train-d to city hall,
walk to old merlion park, ate ice cream.
alot of past memories :(
train-d back to pasir ris
had dinner @ mc.
played swing (*)
went hme.

Loving unconditional means
forgiving and learning to live with his imperfections.
Because in the end you'll realize
that's what you love the most.

Dreams dont come true

2009-06-16T20:57:00.005+08:00

slept for 12 hrs.
woke up @ 3+
prepare to go out
went to fetch bi frm sch.
play pepsi cola, chopstick & scissors paper stone on bus,
loser kena slap :D
ofcos , i'm nt the loser lahhh.
hahahaha !
&& bodyache, feelingso uncomfortable :(

Edited:/ 10.20pm

Bi, using the same methodto cheer me up.
but this time i'm still upset.

edited:/ 12.09am
talk to tris on phone for 3hr,
& he forced me to blog abt it.

Well, we'll nv be back like the past.
every on & thn she'll appear in my mind.
why come bck to me whn you left me for them ?
damn confused with this relationship,
i need to reconsider this major decision.
blissfully attached to mrkong for 484 days,
now its time to think wht i rly want.

Will this love last ?

2009-06-15T21:38:00.005+08:00

Meet bi @ 12 pm
went to ws ate mc double cheeseburger :D
train-d to chinatown,
walk arnd like idiot.
went to fook hai building look for bi's grooming scissors.
he cnt find the one tht suits him,
train-d to vivo wanted to watch movie.
but in the end train-d bck to tamp
( due to sme reason )
watch " drag me to hell "
Bi shout & scream like mad.
&&&& i pinch him throughout the show.
bite him occasionally :D
meet his mum had dinner @ swensens
thn his mum drive us hme.

edited:/ 1.59 am

my hubby did this for me:D

edited:/9.05pm , 16 june

Bi did this to cheer me up

jayboy, mummy love you!
Blissfully attached to mr kong for 483 days

Happy wife, Lucky man

2009-06-14T21:55:00.002+08:00

Tdy dint go out, hell tired.
dint meet hubby for the whole day
he jus reach hme currently talking to me on phone.
&&&& i miss him hell lot.
tmr gng chinatown to buy his stuffs,
watch movie @ tamp.
thn meet his mum.

love is impulsive,
i wonder how long this love will last.

Fucked up (!)

2009-06-12T23:23:00.004+08:00

Kongwei ton over @ my hse lastnight
did sme grooming for jayboy
jayboy is handsome now :DDDDDDDD
Woah(!) something make me damn angry lahhhhh!
This morning went to his hse,
he carry me to his room
slept for 5 hrs
woke up @ 4plus.
ate my breakfast & lunch ( chef kong cook it)
Went off to tamp with intention of eating dinner
@sme high class restaurant
but dint get to eat ( bcos i'm nt feeling well :( )
went to shop
kongwei: dear, see wht you want jus take ok.
laogong pay for it.
Eileen: you say one ahhhh!
i brought alot of things, kongwei carry them for me:D
slept throughout the journey back hme.
reach hme left my stuffs @ hme
went to feed my cat w kongwei.
BYEBYE MOMO,
IMY,ILY!

Man in relationship tends to simpify things,
Woman in relationship tends to complicate things.

I'll stay strong & learn how to be independent over agn

2009-06-10T21:35:00.002+08:00

Nothing gonna change my love for you.
I'd chosen another way to love you.
This is where an old chapter ends & a new chapter begins.
The whole new life in begins.
i'm sorry, i gotta leave.

Love fades over time

2009-06-09T20:43:00.007+08:00

Went to sengkang @ 1pm for lunch
ate mos burger.
meet kong wei & gigi 6.30pm outside my sis tuition centre
he came over to my house be maria
MARIA KONGWEI~
he bath my jayjay & momo
GROOMER KONGWEI~
thn fetch my sister frm tuition
kong wei send us home
BODYGUARD KONGWEI~

( the dogs are cute )

(Gigi girl :DDDDD )

( groomer/maria/bodyguard kongwei wearing boxers doing jayjay :DDD )

When a man treats a woman as a friend,
he treat her as a man.
When a woman treats a man as a friend,
its a start of a relationship.

EILEEN IS SICK !

2009-06-08T13:29:00.008+08:00

Early afternoon 12pm,
i went to visit doctor @ wp clinic,
took alot medicine & it cost me $ 51.20.
Woah, fk expensive sia.
I doubt i gna take the medicine lahhhh.
Feeling so unwell now,
i decided to stay @ hme whole day
to complete my vacation hw.
C'mon, entertain me okay ?
It's boring to stay @ hme whole day w/o entertainment

*Added : packed my rm for 1hr frm 2.30-3.45pm
my room is v clean now :D
bathing my dogs soon ( postponed to tmr, too sick to do it)
after tht i gotta go out for awhile.
Tonight i'm gng out for a run with my babies :DDDDDD
I SWEAR I'LL NOT TAKE THE STUPID MEDICINE.
FEELING SO DROWSY & BITTER NOW.
I WANT KINDER JOY !

It sucks to see us ending up this way
have you forgotten all we had went through?
Aint you hurt or upset over this ?
why are you pushing all the blame & accusing me ?
I DONT DESERVE ALL THIS.

Blahblahblah

2009-06-07T20:41:00.008+08:00

FUCK IT !

Spent 2 hours editing my blogskin :DDDD

no longer can differentiate which is lies & truth

this kind of feeling sucks
gotta go my own way

:(

2009-06-06T22:25:00.004+08:00

went cantonment for smt
thn kw's mum treat us lunch
thn send me & kw to ws ( replace my ezlink :( )
meet my mum went smewhr
reached hme @ 8pm sharp
clear all my dogs' shit & pee
bath & stuffs
finally can rest alr ! :D

this love aint going perfect
unpleasant memories struck in my head
pleasant memories are so much lesser thn unpleasant

Happiness

2009-06-05T14:10:00.007+08:00

wake up @ 12pm
will be going for night fishing ltr with kongwei, jahan & rueben
( if the counselor still on for it )
will update my post ltr on abt the night fishing
Attention ! my night fishing cancelled :(
added : kongwei send me to counselling
met jahan b& rueben 4pm @ control station
went safra play pool
trained back pasir ris @ 7.30pm
reach @ 8 +
went his hse eat & play with gigi
went off to meet jahan agn @ 9++
cabbed hme @ 10.30pm
lost my ezlink :(
kongwei is finding all details abt lost of ezlink
& he blame himself for it, wna pay for my ezlink
when i'm the careless one forgotten tht i'm holding my ezlink
carelessly lost it smewhr
tmr meeting kongwei, jahan & rueben gng cantonment(stress)
kongwei's mum sending

the toilet is beautiful :D kongwei & jahan waiting for me outside :$
convince me,
prove to me.

Thanks for being there :D

2009-06-05T13:53:00.011+08:00

4th June 2009

meet kongwei 7pm under my house.
trained to city hall
saw jiarui
took singapore flyer (9pm)
had dinner @ popeye (9.45pm)
vvvvv full
trained back pasir ris ( last train )
took 53 meet jahan & benjamin under kongwei's block ( slack )
took last bus hme with kongwei
reach hme @ 1pm
talk & play until 2pm
kongwei slept @ my hse.

photos of the day

Flyers tickets :D

$ 10 per meal ( Kongwei treat )

highest pt of flyer, he kissed me

city view from the flyer

our destination

Legend : A couple kiss @ the highest point will be in love forever
how wonderful can it be if our love last forever
i doubt this love
aint gng give a second chance
prove to me your love

Woah

2009-06-03T20:51:00.005+08:00

Spent my day @ hme talking on phone whole day with him.
Meet him for an hr under my hse.
now back hme talking to him on phone

Do you knw how much i wanted to be with you,
but i cant forget the past.
i dont wna let history repeat,
therefore i'm not gng bck to you.
Prove to me,
our love will last.

I'd chosen another way to love you

2009-06-03T00:05:00.006+08:00

He's here to say tht he's sorry
& ask for a second chance.

Today went to his house from 11.30am until 9.30pm
spent hours @ his house doing nth.
play with his dog,
& he's my maria for the day.
doing everything for me i dont have to lift a finger @ all.
watch shin chan & fall asleep beside him.
went off to loyang pt,
brought mcflurry & coke.
thn went hme @ 10.30pm
reach hme @ 11pm.
do both dogs stuffs, tired out.

Too late to say that you're sorry,
bcos i aint gng to love you bck.
you shall reap wht you sow.

Not in the mood

2009-06-01T23:50:00.004+08:00

TOO TIRED TO BLOG TODAY.

in summary,
went out with him until 8pm
momo is @ my hse nw.
taking good care of her.
waiting for him to reach hme to talk to me.
vvvvv bored & kinda miss him a lil.
But i aint loving him back.

It's hard to forgive you,
hard to forget the pain you inflicted on me,
but for the sake of her & your persistence i'm giving it a shot.
Trust me, i'm trying my best

31 may 2009

2009-05-31T22:40:00.002+08:00

I tried to hold on,
but it hurts too much.

Wake up 9am bcos he blast my phone.
send him to his school
waited for 6 hrs for him alone ( doing nth )
after tht went ehub
with intention to eat mr chicken rice
but alot ppl thr spoil my appetite
went to sweet hse instead
i had meesiam & he ate laksa.
wanted to catch a movie ( be silent )
but dont have alr :(
thn went to play swing @ pasir ris town park ( nv fails to cheer me up )
went to ws shop.
saw smeone i dont wna see thr ( spoil my mood )
thn had chilli cheese fries ( @ superdog )
after tht went for a stick
went to ntuc brought 2 box of ice cream :D
walk to inter took 359 hme.
saw nicolette & had a small chat
slack under a block eating icecream
walk hme @ 9.30pm ( slow walk )
reach hme @ 10pm
Happyday, @ the same time sucks alot

I'm letting go,
too tired to hold on.

30 may 2009

2009-05-30T16:23:00.008+08:00

29th May 2009 & 30th May 2009

morning meet kongwei, he send me to school.
not feeling v well in sch, thn kongwei wanted to bring me visit doctor.
but he got sch, so i rejected his offer.
& i got the 3rd position in class!
L1R4 17 pts
After school, went to smoke with kaiyu thy all.
bus-ed hme, change bath & stuffs
meet jahan girl girl & pianus rueben
went to tiong bahru thn vivo.
counselor treat us dinner.
& i dint even finish half of it.
he drove us bck to pasir ris
thn walk rueben with girlgirl
meet kongwei & gigi with girlgirl
slack until 10pm cabbed hme,
watch my drama last episode
meet them @ 11pm under my hse.
trained to bugis.
ton the whole night
thy she sha-ing the night away
kongwei came over to my hse @ 4.30am
sleep until 7am, he went hme.
meeting kongwei @ 6.30 pm

*Edited : meet jiahao instead of kongwei @ 6.30pm
went to east point for dinner, restaurant lehhh !
*Added : My trip to singapore flyer is getting nearer.
Let's get fucked up & die tgt
Life is so damn meaningless.
My life sucks big time !
When will this train of problems stop ?
To hell with it, it's making my life miserable

This love aint going perfect
Lets stop pretending.

28 May 2009

2009-05-28T19:15:00.005+08:00

Time to let go ~

Late for school,
play during english & maths.
slp the rest of my day away.
meet rick @ ws for lunch
reach hme @ 3+
Fall asleep, vvvv giddy.
wake up @ 6.30pm
talk to germaine on phone (20 mins)
talk to jiahao on phone (30 mins)
Going out now,
will be home by 8pm :D
thn try to sneak out for dinner with jiahao
i'm terribly hungry now :(

Add: ( too bored in sch )

Love is prove with actions,
not words.
nth gna make me trust you agn,
fking tired of this kind of life.
gotta go my own way.

27 may 2009

2009-05-27T20:45:00.005+08:00

Once your girl,

Today went to school, sleep frm 7.30-10.55
after recess is dnt, was chionging my practical.
It was wonderful :)
Went for a stick with kaiyu thy all,
thn went hme.
sleep till 4pm
Intended to fetch kongwei frm school de
but the weather is jus too hot.
in the end kongwei waited for me :P
went compass pt for mos burger.
thn went hme to bring jayboy dwn to find kongwei.
after tht went to meet fren under my hse.
reached hme @ 8pm.

truth hurts & lies worse
i tried to hold on but it hurts too much,
i tried to forgive but it's not enough to make it all okay.

26 may 2009

2009-05-26T22:53:00.002+08:00

Tdy went for maths trail, fking hot & i almost died frm sweating.
saw sir stamford raffles hahahaha.
i dint knw tht thr was two version of him
one black & one white.
on the journey back to sch i fall asleep.
Went hme after school,
change, make up went out meet jahan & rueben
* i pissed jahan off tdy, finally took my revenge :D
Damn damn no mood to blog tdy,
bcos i'm sick agn :(

Dont wna hold on,
to tired to continue on.

25 may 2009

2009-05-25T21:16:00.008+08:00

25 MAY 2009

Today wake up, rushing like idiot. meet Evangeline @ 6.30 took breakfast.
Reached school @ 7.20am
Today damn sway, damn damn damn.
Terrible mood swings.
After school went straight home,
went out meet glenn @ 4.30pm
reached hme @ 6.30pm
suppose to meet smeone,
but fall asleep, in the end meet him @ 8pm
slack until 9pm
reach home @ 9.20

24 MAY 2009

went chalet @ 8am
involved in a fight.
fking 18 yr old fat bitch punch my mouth
in the end she kena whacked by everyone
went off @ 10
meet smeone @ 10.30
went alot places.
meet kongwei @ 6.30pm
fking du lan the whole day!
reached home @10.15pm
* to the 18 yr old fat bitch, nt happy come agn lahhhh hor.
knn !

Lets stop pretending,
our love cnt be mended.

23 may 2009

2009-05-23T22:09:00.007+08:00

Friends Gathering :D

Today woke up @ 1pm
play comp reply smses.
bath prepare myself,
jiahao under my house waiting for me
Brought my jayboy over to chalet.
Played the whole day.
went hme @ 7,
bcos someone is so concern
on his fren's behalf
Hahaha.
well, jiahao drive me hme.
i bring jay hme & i went out agn :D
hahaha !
someone, i dint brk promise.
i did went home.
went back chalet pillow fight
&&& drink !!
kinda seh nw,
Liling brought her daughter baby michy here
vvvvv cute sia.
i love babies :DDDDDDD
Finally reach home @ 10 plus.
just in time to blog & shower before my show start.
* the someone i'd been mentioning for days is jus my FRIEND
his name cnt be spelled out due to some reason
Thank you!

Credits : photographer jiahao

22nd May 2009's memories

Vandalism

Our relationship is over & done with,
getting used to days without you.

22 may 2009

2009-05-22T21:53:00.006+08:00

Today damn not in the mood lahhhh,
my fever comes & go like wht sia.
Meet evangeline @ 6.15am for breakfast
late for bus, cabbed to school with deon & evangeline.
Reached school @ 7.25am just in time
I failed my english :( by 1 mark bcos of a fullstop
fuckit !
A1 for combined sci & dnt
A2 for chinese
C5 for combined humans
D7 for english
F9 for maths
25 points :(
fucking disappointed

Now, i'm v upset over my results.
dont want anything else except for my studies ler.
after sch went home change,
meet jahan & rueben
went to east coast for cycling
Thn tired now.
Talk alot to jahan,
v disappointed in someone now.
5.30 bus-ed bck pasir ris.
reach pasir ris @ 7pm.
cabbed to meet someone,
&& tht someone pay my cab fare.
actually wanted ask shiping ask his mum send me de
but he dont want :(
Reach hme @ 9 today.
ltr maybe gng out.
&&& finally i'm hungry.

It takes time to build up the trust,
but trust can be destroyed overnight.
That feeling aint right anymore,
prove to me tht you love me more thn anything else
with love {♥}

Eileen

21 may 2009

2009-05-21T20:11:00.004+08:00

NOT IN MOOD TO BLOG. VVVVVV SICK.

what yours will always be yours
wht not meant to be will be lost eventually.
Words left unsaid.
with love {♥}

Eileen

Fucking sad

2009-05-20T23:30:00.008+08:00

Fucked up day,

Tdy meet jahan & rueben @ ws 11.15 ( jahan warned me to reach before 11am ) &&& he's late. Reached tiong bahru @ 12. smoke reach beyond @ 12.15pm. Fuck, i gotta wear thr t shirt and wear sport shoes bcos i wear until too revealing liao. Went to DRC fucked de lohhhhh ! police officers shouting @ us fk lohhh. thn jahan cnt go in :( till 4 + thn end. reached beyond @ 5 ++ finally change back to my outfit. Jahan && rueben disturb me for one whole day damn them. i got their secrets & jahan is a gentleman, hahahaha ! reached ws @ arnd 7 + meet michelle and evangeline for a talk. cabbed hme @ 9.40pm. dint call my counselor tdy :$ &&& Jahan is still disturbing me, wondering whn will he stop.went to meet someone for awhile. Finally reach home :)

Jahan & rueben, you mus be vv angry with me now right.
Thats was wht i feel jus now. Ass.

Given time, good man also will change
Does good man still exist in this world?
Anyw, Boy i'm willing to say yes
if only you do wht i want the most.
with love {♥}

Eileen

:P

2009-05-19T19:48:00.010+08:00

Sometimes goodbye is a second chance.

Today's paper start @ 12.30, 30 mins paper. My physics got an A1 :D Hahahahahahaha ! Mr ong tell me tht time i was like O.o dno wht to do. hahahahhaa ! &&&& heard frm mr kue tht mr tan woon wee had been praising me in his sec 4 classes telling them how powerful my folio is. Well, i'm not the best in his class but to him i'm the best student lahhhhh. Bcos eileen is a vvvvvv goodgirl. My maths constantly failing since sec1, though this yr common tests i did pass, but i doubt i gna pass my mye :( Fuck it lahhhhh! i'll only fail one sub this yr &&& promote to sec 4e4 :D Shag, tmr cnt meet frens, gotta meet jahan & rueben for dno wht drug thing(DONT BE MISTAKEN, WE DINT TOOK DRUGS). lame lohhhh. damn waste my time sia. i want go out have fun de lehhh. i want to meet all friends, so damn hell long dint meet them ler. Clubbing is FUN ! :D

Jus came back frm Mr Lin jiahao's hse, play with cookie whole day, use his lappy. He totally got no entertainment. He's one and only entertainment is smoke & disturb me.To those ppl who thot tht LinJiahao is my boyf, you're an idiot. He's jus my fren. vvvv close boy-fren. Tht's all.

* added : Talking to my brother now, my stress. &&& my muscles are aching, i'm feeling so sick :(

& now i had to face wht i hate to face, the reality
His actions nv fail to put a smile on my face.
Boy, you make me wna fall in love with you

with love {♥}

Eileen

Happening

2009-05-18T21:24:00.008+08:00

Happening day :D

Today damn happening sia, waited for germaine with evangeline, frens and my dog. went loyang pt to settle things. Thy dint come, in the end cme with 4 boys. Boys not involved. Thn went up blk, she cried. i panic, alot lot things lahhh not convieniet to say here, ask me for details. my leg bleeding like mad. Police come up thn swayness. Thn finally everything end, cabbed hme to send jay. evangeline and doreen under my hse waiting for me. i went dwn went ehub. ate mr chicken rice when we planned to eat other things, dint plan to watch movie in the end we watch uninvited hahaha ! i want watch alot horror movies ; orphan, dno wht hell, be silent. Bring me go ok? Well, after tht went to took alot of photos. walk along the path to ws, EVANGELINE ACCIDENTLY KICK A FROG! LOLED! she scream, &&&& the world is looking @ us. Hahahaha ! went ws thn buy concession. thn took bus i need to meet someone. thn slack until 9 :D Today is my last paper ! Hahahaha. Ton Ton Ton !!!!!

* added : i grabbed doreen's hand throughout the movie. hahaha !

Crazy

playing

Cute ?

Damn crazy

i want this @ ehub arcade, be tht man catch it for me

Draw this during exam :D

Nice drawing ! artist eileen

Wht lost is lost , i shall move on
Old one dont go new dont come
with love {♥}

Eileen

Boring

2009-05-17T16:59:00.005+08:00

Boy, you make me wna fall in love with you.

Today i vv guai, stay @ home the whole day. dint go out bcos of the fking fever. Damn lahhhhh, fking scared is H1N1 sia. Ang chye poh @ my hse now doing funny things, dump thing dwn aim at some idiot head. hahaha ! i'm laughing like mad lahhhhh ! Fuck fever, i'm feeling so weak now :( last night went to upp serangoon rd eat roti prata worsen my sore throat. Boys w/o guts can go to hell. Hongster nv dies :D well, i'll be gng out @ 8pm :) i wna talk ! so sad, i cnt talk ler lahhh neither can i sing~ suffering like mad now !

Thr's no fairytale in this real world

with love {♥}
Eileen

sick ~

2009-05-16T20:05:00.003+08:00

Regrets ~

Today damn sick lahhhhh, actually gng to old merlion park with jiahao but i'm just so sick. No worries, not H1N1 lahhh, no fever. Jus terrible sorethroat & running nose. Jiahao bring me visit doctor, took alot of medicine. I'm sorry jiahao, i'll not be taking it. Kns lohhh. Waste his $40 tdy visiting doctor. Went to his hse play with cookie. & cookie jump onto my face licking me. Loled. Jiahao pass me the bouquet of roses, in a romantic way, i prefer it to be done @ old merlion park. My romantic visit to old merlion park postponed agn. Today dint talk alot dint sing. so poor thing lahhhh !

1st regret, eating fast food for days
2nd regret, singing all day long
3rd regret, dint drink plenty of water
4th regret, shout loud @ mushroom head

Hopefully i'll recover before monday, if not how to shout @ her and slap her?
&&&& ppl pls be considerate, sms me dont call. i cnt talk due to terrible sore throat. Thanks !

Eileen aint serious in any relationship.
so pls, dont misunderstand me .

with love {♥}
Eileen

dear, i miss you

2009-05-15T20:39:00.007+08:00

Today was fun :D

exam was easy, not tht stressful
9 end, went home with evangeline
went bus stop took bus 3
slept on bus
reach tampines
shop till we drop
brought alot cow stuffs
went back pasir ris @ 4
met jonathan, jahan & rueben
Jahan ask me alot things
left for germaine's uncle's music studio @ 6
Lost at blk 500 +
germaine & evangeline looking around for me
reach her uncle hse @ 6 ++
Leave @ 7.30
Going rounding @ 1 am :D

This cost $

looking @ the spoil bulb in toilet

with love {♥}
Eileen

2009-05-14T17:48:00.003+08:00

Fucked up !

Today damn not in the mood. Physics paper was easy wasnt tht stress compared to maths paper 2. Hell it, i almost die frm taking maths paper 2. Head damn pain ! &&& i figure out smt, kongwei will only msg me at night bcos he got no one to accompany him. or rather he's girlf not thr. HAHA ! i kinda smart right. after school, same routine. tdy @ mc saw someone fking awkward, dno why will got tht feeling. i suspect tht kongwei betrayed me told him the secret. damnnnnnnnn ! But i rly dont love tht guy sia ! I was jus falling for him bcos he resembles kongwei niaaa lohhhh but in the end i think i shldnt treat anyone as his replacement lohh. Mr ashley tan, thanks for your gdluck msg &&& always thr for me :D Jasper's golden retriever got the same name as jiahao's golden retriever, cookie. hahaha! C'mon we shall go out someday with our dogs uh.

This was wht i did during my maths paper.

with love {♥}
Eileen

vv happy tdy

2009-05-13T21:07:00.010+08:00

I'm happy today...

Tdy i finally realized smt, the one i love is old kongwei, not the new kongwei. Bcos of tht i dont love kongwei ler :D I was struck in the past now i'll move on. my old kongwei ( xiaokongzi ), i love you alot i'll nvr forget the memories we'd. Those times whn i give stupid attitude, quarrel with you & you'll foolishly wait under my hse for me. Hell sweet lahhh! The most romantic thing tht happen btwn us. Alot alot nice nice romantic things, thanks for giving me those nice memories. How nice can it be to stay lidat forever. Whenever we quarrel now you'll just leave me alone to die, fuck it new kongwei. Tdy i almost get into a new relationship just bcos he resembles my old kongwei. haha. luckily, i think carefully lahhhhh.

After exam 9am when for a stick, evangeline came over my hse, i bath make up and stuffs. when over to evangeline's house. i did her make up for her ! hahaha! i can be a make up artist liao can. meet doreen and vivian at bus stop went to school nearby, blk 249 meet germaine kenric benji kai yu xuan hao and alot more. settle sme thing with someone. &&& i kinda make a new friend tdy, Jianhua. haha. after tht went ws super dog eat ( i didnt eat) after tht me and evangeline went to whampoa for model interview &&& thr looks strange to me. like pian xiao hai. scary can. We rejected the job due to unreasonable terms. took 21 back. took abt 2 hr. ( used to take bus go thr find kw & took the slow bus back alone. sweet right :D ) went tampines to eat mos burger && i was complaining abt my terrible sore throat ! :( Reached home at 9pm sharp haha.

Cats having sex :)

Ytd at germaine's uncle studio

Evangeline at ws inter

View frm platform

Fun

Mos burger

Evangeline & Eileen

with love {♥}
Eileen

Woah

2009-05-12T19:56:00.004+08:00

FRIENDS ARE WONDERFUL :D

Today dint get to meet jonathan as he was held back by a meeting :( But i still spent a wonderful day with my friends :D meet germaine and evangeline at ws super dog had chlli cheese fries as my breakfast lunch and dinner . Save money right ! haha ! thn we went to germaine's uncle's music studio( it looks so classic ) Left there at 6 went to whitesands super dog agn, planned to study. But all of us wasnt in the mood, & we started gossiping.Talking abt boys, how bastard thy can be. By uglifying others doesnt make you a btr person uh. Its an act of coward, so pls grow up la idiots. Saw mattew and i thot he is titus kinda embarrassing :$ Tdy i'd some random thoughts of you. No longer thinking abt how happy we were, but thinking abt how badly you treated me. Ass. Tdy was a vv bad day for me. I dint focus on my mother tongue paper 2 ( & i totally forget abt this paper ) && its was so damn diff to focus on my maths lahhh, bcos i went drinking last night. Head fking pain this morning :( && my legs, hands are full of plasters. Getting clumsy this few days. I gna fail my maths paper 1 and mother tongue paper 2. Stress ~ Well, tmr paper is history vv easyto score subject, hahaha ! therefore, i'm not studying for it. Damn not in the mood tdy, can ppl pls cheer me up.

Tmr will be a wonderful day for me lahhh, going for an interview at whampoa, && thr's smt exciting happening tmr. looking forward for it :D

My mr right, why i dont see you anywhere today ?
nvm, i want to go to old merlion park with my beloved man.
damn romantic de lahh,

with love {♥}
Eileen

Boring day :(

2009-05-11T19:39:00.006+08:00

Everything shall be in points today

2pm woke up by jahan
on my laptop feed my restaurant city employees & talk in msn for 30 mins
Start work for 1 hr
Study 2 hr for my maths paper tmr
bath for 1 hr
Forget to smoke & eat :D
walk my dog saw alot of frens downstair
blogging
Meeting jiahao for dinner at 8

Tmr schedule

Leave hse at 6.30 am
go for exams until 12pm
go home
leave house at 1.30pm
meet jahan rueben and jonathan
go super dog study :D
go rounding
reach home before 8pm

Pple, not using old number ler.
occasionally using it due to work.
Thanks :D

& whoever call me on my old no. last night pls let me knw. bcos i was watching one miss call 2 & i got a miss call on my phone which makes me vv scared & thr are funny noises coming out from the call whn i call bck the number :( i dont dare sleep ler. pls dont lame and play the stupid prank on me ok.

My horoscope says " tmr if meet one guy 3 times at diff places
me & him will last forever :D
Wonder who'll it be.

with love {♥}
Eileen

I'd chosen another way to love you

2009-05-10T17:33:00.003+08:00

Goodbye, my love

My boy, i chose to let go this 14 month r/s, this is my fifth day w/o you ler. I'm missing you right now, thts the main reason i'm blogging.Having random thoughts of you tdy but i can rly say the feeling i have for you seems to be disappearing, few more days, no matter how & wht you do i also wont go bck to you ler. I got alot to say, alot to ask you. This fourteen months is a waste ? You never love me before ? She rly tht impt, thts why you're leaving me? Why you must wait till i totally give up on you, determined to leave you ler thn you decided to cherish me? I hate it whn you lie, hate it whn you sound frustrated, hate it whn you vent your anger on obj, hate it whn you leave me alone. You knw you're losing me to him day by day, i doubt you give a damn. All you knw is say, all words no action. Wait for me ? Why not woo me bck? instead of blaming me, blame yourself ? You're rly strange. whatever it is lahhh, i'm letting you go. This time i'm sure. Boy, i loved you before. Cried for you before. Now all is left is to forget about you. This might sound easy, but i'm struggling. But thanks to my friends, i'd let go bit by bit. All my friends ask me to forget you. Are we just tht not fated ? Fine, forgt it :D

Today went out celebrate mothers' day with family, went to my uncle's hse. Apple is so cute ! she damn obedient lohh & she's a smart dog. Dogs are really cute & adorable. Just reach hme, ask jonathan for some allowance tdy so tht i can stay out ltr, && been a extremely nice guy, he allow lahh. He's the best counsellor ever man! Looking forward to tuesday meet up, Guess we'll be gng to super dog study uhhh. Hahaha. super dog is a vv nice environment :D Tuesday mother tongue paper 2 & maths paper 1. i'm so not motivated :( c'mon ppl motivate me. i feel so hopeless in maths lohhhh. Hated tht subj hell lot. Wish me gd luck for tuesday paper. Tmr is public holiday, chionging my maths. hahaha ! Faithfully writing my diary daily :D & my maria jerald say i'm one of those few girls who keep diary.

C'mon, Be my mr right. motivate me. on your knees, ask for one last dance.
Bring me to the places i want to go, do those things i like for me.
&& i'll be all yours, your wifey.

with love {♥}
Eileen

tiring ~

2009-05-09T19:47:00.009+08:00

Come on, Lets do it together!

Tdy damn damn tired, wore heels[2-3 inches] the whole day. Met lester khoo 2pm @ ws control station, trained 19 stops to clarke quay. I was wondering if only you were here for me. tdy is the fourth day w/o you by me. did you sms me ? well, i thot thr will be a surprise tdy frm you ? why i dont see anyt ? hahaha, guess tht surprise is meant for her now . Wish you all the best & i'm recovering well. Back to topic lahh, today i wear until damn damn mature, white tube + white skirt &&& heels. Make up with fake eye lashes. i look totally diff, damn damn mature like some office lady lahh. Lester say " woah! you look so mature dont look like sixteen sia. " Thn i was like so happy lahhh ! you alw say i wear until like some lil kid finally got pple praise me mature liao are you jealous ? Mr lester khoo waited for me while i was having my training(1h ). after tht we went shopping awhile, trained 11 stops bck to sengkang. i fall asleep while travelling lah. Arrive sengkang @ 5 ++ thn ate mos burger :D damn ex sia! $7.20 lohhh. after tht we had a small talk until 6.30 pm. we went for a smoke thn headed home. Swayness, we waited for 89 hell long, the moment we board bus the bus broke down! damn damn sway lahhhh!!!! saw clive yeo, he smile at me & being a friendly girl, i smile bck :) drag so long finally reached home ler. && now my leg are aching & damn damn tired, i need someone to massage for me ! keeping diary frm tdy onwards:D actually wanted to take photo de but i was just too lazy. Mr khoo, you're a nice guy. Thanks :)

* My dearest mr right, comeon do it for me & i'll say yes. i'll be your wifey :D
my jayboy is diagnosed with asthma how ? i love jayboy

with love {♥}
Eileen

Be happy

2009-05-08T15:00:00.003+08:00

Stay Happy :D

Today is the third day i'm living in the world w/o you by my side. Quite used to it ler, finally grow up and independent ler.
If suddenly you come bck to me i think i'll feel quite uncomfortable loh. Guess you are her's alr. Hais.. Kinda sad whnever i think of you. Nvm, i'll continue to stay strong. 3 days dint hear frm you, sorry i dint on my phone, facebook msgs you gave i dint see. everytime see my sim card got the temptation to check my phone. everytime i see facebook got your msgs i feel like taking a look, but i dont want waste my effort, been tarhan-ing for 3 days ler. &&& i think my feelings for you not tht strong ler. If suddenly you appear infront of me i'm afraid tht i might not be able to hold on. maybe bcos you dint do anyt to hold bck like before. maybe you'd changed to smeone idk. You're no longer the weiwei i knw ler :( Miss last time alot . but my life now also not bad, everyday with frens. no quarrels, no sadness, no tears. Why cnt we be bck like last time ? those time when we were so damn sweet. no lies no quarrels ? && you showering me with love and concern. All i get now is scolding, shouting and blaming frm u. u used to take all blame even when i'm at fault. so sweet and nice. Nvm, at least now i knw we'll nvr be back like last time, you no longer love me. &&& my feelings for you is not as strong as in the past. Kongwei is a nice guy, you btr treat him well. if i knw you play him i cfm will snatch bck de :D just kidding. what past is past.

Well, today the fking paper make my hand so pain. wrote so much for my essay guess i only manage to get a pass. sad sia! after school went home straight, changed meet jahan and rueben for a stick before meeting jonathan. he's kinda cute and handsome ah. kwalijun praise him too.HAHA! gng east coast cycle with him after exam, as idk hw to cycle, i'm gng to be his pillion. Romantic right! dont mistaken lahhh, he's jus my counsellor and he's vv old ok! 20 plus. gng to catch a movie with him, jahan and rueben, & it's totally free. On 20th may 2009, we are going for an excursion for drug dk wht de. next tuesday meeting up with him too. && i'm nt as shy as i first met him ler. more open up and my vulgarities start to fly out. like so unglamorous lah. But i'll change to a lady who dont sprout vulgarities.

Comeon, my mr right. bring me thr and i'll be yours :D

with love {♥}
Eileen

Finally letting go of you.

2009-05-07T19:18:00.004+08:00

Finally letting you go.

today i didnt nonsense in class :( but i slept the whole day lohh, dno why i'm so tired. My tummy hurts alot, my eye is killing me & trying to vomit but it doesnt want to come out. & i was singing yue liang dai biao wo de xin, maybe bcos i miss you.. How's your life w/o me. I bet you're happier. I'll get away from your life & would NVR interupt your life ler. Well, this time i'm tht determine lohhh, dint even read his msg in facebook or hp. Bcos all this will make my tears drop. Been thinking why must all this happen, we had been so sweet. Why lie to me ?! All those promise you made was jus bullshitting ? We'd been through so much & you chose her over me. Imagine one day i on my hp && its flooded with his msgs but i doubt this bcos i knw you no longer love me. But time heals alot, as for today, i dont miss you tht much as ytd. Day by day i'm healing. I loved you too much tht all this is hurting me so badly. I think i dont love you as much as the past ler maybe bcos you're no longer the kongwei i knew & you'll remain like this. I'm feeling so uncertain abt my feelings now. I still have feelings for you ? Idk damn damn confused now. The path of letting you go wasnt easy, requires alot of courage and determination lohhh however, i'll stay strong & firm bcos wht past is past, we're in the present & we must think of the future, quoted evangeline.

Well, after school went for a smoke with kenric soong & frens. After tht, waited for evangeline at the void deck with an jie and reuben. An jie ask me """' will u'll give kw another chance ? '' and my ans was a straight no, bcos i knw no matter wht he'll nvr change bck to last time de kongwei whom i fall madly for. So why bother hurt us and waste time. Lets move on :D Mr koh came & chase us away, we went to blk 215 thn i saw xinyi and company. Anjie and reuben went first :( Wait & wait, till 2.30. But i dint blame her lahhh. When ws to study, wahlao ehhh! the drinks in the library cafe is so damn ex lah dey! $3.80 for ice chocolate, damn. i dint study, no motivations at all &&&& those haising idiots are a great disturbance lah ~ fking step gangster. Arnd 5.30pm meet germaine & gossip :D i went at 6.40pm finally reach home @ 7.10pm. &&& blog, bcos i got alot alot things to tell you but i knw i'll interupt your life hence, i decided to treat this blog as you.

Tmr english paper 2 and social studies sia, i'm not motivated at all. Hopefully i'll manage to pass with flying colours lahhh. Tmr meeting jonanthan, reuben & jahan for a stupid run, shagness. 2pm @ ws :( Sat meeting mr ong with germaine and evangeline to study till 2 pm, &&& need t train to clarke quay for training. Thanks friends. :)

Mr cow, i dont want anyt to happen to you. You're my bestbest fren sia. When i'm dwn you encourage me, now you're dwn & its my turn to cheer you up. &&&& He's just my fren, nth else dont mistaken!

Well, i need to study for tmr's paper ler. Wish me gd luck :D
& tmr is my jayboy one yr old bithday, wish him happy birthday too :)

I want my Mr right to do my fairytale for me & prove to me tht fairytales do exist, thr's still true love in earth. When will my romantic mr right appear?

with love {♥}
Eileen

Wonderful day :D

2009-05-06T20:38:00.007+08:00

Determination

Today school was wonderful, played throughout the day didnt really study lahhhh :$ During maths, Ms lie ask us do the maths past year papers &&& i fall asleep. I didnt bring distinction in comprehension Mrs lee forgive me, Evangeline shared her book with me but i wanted to sleep, she sing for me & woke me up. arghhh ! But when its her turn to sleep, i sang ! Haha. Then i acting reporter cum camera man using camera ( evangeline's mirror) & mike ( evangeline's comb ) && mrs lee cuaght me in action,gave a shocked look. Doing alot of lame stuffs lahhh, rly very fun & i laugh out loud ! Hahahahaha ! Mr tan was extremely gd to me tdy lahhh, making me laugh. Anyw teachers, i'm sorry for my attitude past few days. Tmr onwards i'll be a goodgirl & bring all tb :D ( vvvvvvv heavy :( )

Well, after school met evangeline & mr ong for lunch. Mr ong today spent anrd$ 100 on us can! He brought me a new prepaid card ( to stop seeing his msgs so tht i wont cry anymore ) Mr ong is the best teacher ever. Had been giving in alot to me, i'm vv sorry for the times i misbehave & show attitude. Headed home @ 4 and chat with evangeline (my dearest girlf ). Time flies ahhh, our small chat turn out to be a LONG chat, talk till 7 thn we part. Reached home done my work , finally i'm motivated to study :D

My dearest kenric ( my best friend ) , dont be stress. I'm always here for you. No matter wht happens, i'll stand by you and support you. Just a call frm you, i'll be thr. Be happy kenric !

I'm so used to share with you my daily stuffs,now w/o you all i can do is blog. I'm determined to forget you, i'm sorry. I cant hold on anymore, rly tired of mistrust, quarrels, lies & tears. I believe you'll be much more happier w/o me interfering with your life.

Note! : I'd changed my no, so ppl do take frm me ( i'll give certain ppl only ) But my 9111 still thr, once i'd let go of him i'll use bck tht no ler. && tht pimple in my eye hurts big time! To hell with it.

My dearest mr right, when will you appear ? &&& bring me to the place i wanted to go the most, do those romantic stuffs for me :(

With love {♥}
Eileen

Beloved Friends

2009-05-05T20:40:00.005+08:00

My beloved friends,

Today spent a wonderful day in school, Shiping is a vv nice guy. He collecting funds to buy pen frm me which cost ten bucks as he doesnt have $. Kinda stupid right, but i prefer boys like this - sweet & good. Haha. He's a vv nice guy, & i'm so touched ! Beware shiping, i might fall for you uhhhh :D &&&&&&&&& i love to be in school bcos i get to see all my friends, thy cheer me up.

Well, tdy went farmway, giant & ikea with evangeline. We brought a lot a lot of stuffs, spent a lot a lot of money. She's lame lahhhh! We stood under the sun for 10 mins bcos she saw a car approaching( which is arnd 30m away & the car is travelling at the speed of 10km/h) Hahaha ! Stupid right. Saw alot of dogs thr, vv cute & adorable sia. She really vv gd, she make sandwich for me everyday. If thr's a guy who is willing to do all this for me i cfm damn touched lahhhh!

Just ended a call frm mr ong, frm tmr afternoon onwards not using 9111 ler bcos mr ong is buying me prepaid to avoid him. He's obstructing my life by making me upset everyday, i'd cried enough ler. This time i'm serious abt letting him go && take frm me if you want my new number :D dont ask for it frm msn as i wont be online too. i'm sorry friends. I gotta do this, if not i'll be suffering bcos he'd been mentally torturing me daily & i knw he don't love me ler. but once i dont love him i'll use back my 9111 ler. &&& MY PHONE WILL BE OFF ONCE THIS IS POSTED, Thankyou :D

No matter wht, i still believe one day thr'll be this mr right who would bring me to old merlion park, buy me a bouquet of roses, kneel in public,hold my hands, look in to my eyes & propose to me. ( but must be surprise, if not it wont be romantic. Kinda dramatic right. haha :D)

With love {♥}
Eileen

Let go & be happy

2009-05-04T20:11:00.009+08:00

Be Happy, Boy.

Today trained 17 stops all the way to tiong bahru for counseling, did alot of stupid activities with jahan & rueben. Our counselor jonathan is cute and lame, asked alot of questions & i'm so stressed up. Meeting him agn this coming friday at pasir ris park :D &&&& thanks shiping for buying the pen frm me.This morning, my sweetest girlf evangeline made breakfast for me - ham and melted cheese. Damn delicious, she'll make a good girlf & wifey. Well, she asked me this question tdy " do i still love kong wei? " I think abt it vv long, i didnt give her an ans. Cos i really dno wht to say.

It wasnt his fault for leaving me for her, i wasnt as perfect as her. I didnt cherish him back thn. I tried my best as a girlf, but i failed. All i can do now, is to give them my blessing. During the journey i were listening to the song " Last kiss goodbye - hinder "
"No more alibis, no more little lies
You’ve broken my trust and it can’t be fixed
I should’ve seen the signs
Should’ve recognized the way your lips looked like they’ve been kissed
How'd we end up like that?
Another train off the tracks
It always hurts looking back now"
Thinking, why would we ended up this way, wht i'd done to deserve all this. Things will nvr be the same anymore. Recalling the past, we were once so sweet. Am i the one who'd changed or were you the one who'd changed. Idk, i rly rly cnt bear to give up this long relationship. Forever and always dont come true. All along i'm just the BLOODY third party, obstructing both of you. Now i let go, maybe this will be btr for both of us. Well, maybe i'd let go long ago. Tdy met him, my heart no longer hurts. It really breaks my heart when i knw you asked her to be your Mrs kong, really breaks my heart when i knw is bcos she doesnt want you thn you come bck to me. i dont wna be a sub. No matter how you explain i no longer trust you. Dont bother asking me for a patch up, i dont wna be in a relationship whr thr's completely no trust. Maybe becos i knw in your heart thr's no longer my existence. Today, i'd officially let go of him.

To kongwei:
if one day you happen to visit his blog,
this is all i want to tell you

I'm sorry, i dont wna mend a relationship which is completely destroyed
I'm sorry, i give up. Gave you up to her.
I'm sorry, for obstructing both of you
I'm sorry, i cnt fulfil our promise. Together forever and ever.
I'm sorry, i rly dno hw to face you anymore.
I'm sorry, for unable to keep you by my side
I'm sorry, i'm not as perfect as she is.

&&&&& after all this, I still believe in my fairytale, one day my mr right will bring me to old merlion park with a bouquet of roses, kneel in public , hold my hand & look into my eyes and say he loves me.

With love {♥}
Eileen

Life is GREAT!

2009-05-03T11:38:00.010+08:00

Damn, last night he ask me out. He take me so for granted " You go will die ar." Wtf I don't owe him anything, who the hell is he to command me around. Shouldn't he be begging me? Irritating! I'm suppose to meet Jiahao @ 5 today. I very good ler lohh, tell him to meet until 5. He so unreasonable, want the whole day. Have he forgotten tht he left me for HER? &&&&&& I'm glad to announce tht I'm no longer devastated, kinda happy & i don't seems to love him that much ler. Woahhh ~! 14months relationship, i'd let go of it within 3 days. BUT! I seriously loved him deeply before. Maybe the hurt he inflicted on me was too much. Maybe I can treat him as a friend bahh :D I wouldn't foolishly do things and hurt myself agn. Unless he can prove to me tht he rly love me. Really really hope tht one day he would do smt very very touched one. But what he'd done deserve my forgiveness ? Hais... OKAY ! Woke up from my dream ler:D He would only treat her well, in his heart I doubt my existence. She cnt be insulted thn me? FINE ! Damn Damn stress up. Can someone cheer me up &&& give me the motivations to study ?

Lets talk abt reality :)
spent 30 mins preparing myself to go out

Went westplaza wanted to check my acc $
& went to jacky's shop.
instead of jacky,
i saw 3 idiots,
bowen, mingwen & alvin
they bullied me :(
after tht,
met jiahao at ws, went esplanade.
he proposed to me thr, and i reject him agn :)
sorry uhhh, jiahao i need time.
felt awkward went other place, walk pass alot of paths we used to take.
kinda upset now.
BUT! thanks friends, for encouraging me.
if not i might had died frm missing him.

ate this for my lunch and dinner
you must be jealous right,
your fav :D

With love {♥}
Eileen

Leading my life happily :D

2009-05-02T16:58:00.020+08:00

Though i still miss you, cant forget all the things we'd gone through. But i'll let go &&&&&& i'm letting go of you day by day uhhh. Quoted adeline " Thr's mre things to be happy thn to be upset over. " Thanks, adeline &&& i wont let you pple down i'll be happy. Gimme sometime, a few more days will do. Went to interview alone :( trained 19 stops. BUT, luckily Jiahao send me home. Spent a wonderful day. Tdy interview was a SUCCESS, wanted to sms you but halfway of typing i realise we're no longer tgt. I didnt send it. Kinda sad now, Friends, thanks for cheering me up. Trust me, i won't be a disappointment.

Well, lets talk abt happy things. Actually looking for old merlion park( romantic ) but couldnt find. Really hope tht one day thr will be this guy grab my hand and say he loves me at old merlion park. Reality is cruel.

mr clown give it to me and cheer me up :D

Spent 10 min figuring out wht's this, auto soap dispenser :D

Total spent 20 mins in the ladies and kept jiahao waiting outside. I'm sorry ohh :(

Lets have our dinner here someday :)
romantic ?

Eileen's lovers' bridge. Jiahao says " dont lame lehh"

But he ask me for my hand thr, && got rejected :D

The world is beautiful,

Life is GREAT!

Jiahao brought this handphone strap for me :D

Please buy this pen frm me , it cost ten dollar each. Be my first customer. call me at 91114453. Thankyou :D

GUESS Who's my first customer.

Kongwei and benson ohhh :D

Thats all for today. Thankyou !

With love {♥}
Eileen

WTF !

2009-05-01T19:24:00.008+08:00

I seriously dont understand by some ppl can scold others whn thy knw tht thy are at fault and can push all the blame to others. Seriously speaking lahh hor, you're one crazy man. Stop acting like you care alot for me when you're the one gng for another girl. In your heart i wasnt mrs kong at all, i were just a replacement. But its ok, take it as a lesson learnt. &&&& for god's sake lahhhhh, your acting skills sucks. You btr off be dead. All the promises, all the lies. What an unfaithful man, what a liar, what an actor. To Kongwei : you not happy come out talk. dont ccb behind &&& to girls out thr OPEN your eyes widely and choose.

With love {♥}
Eileen

Fuck off lahhhh!

2009-05-01T11:48:00.009+08:00

Jiahao once told me Love is being together with the one you love happily forever. But now tht dont seems real to me anym, i rly want to knw the definition of love. He can lie practically with his eyes wide open & expect me to trust him. Oh pls, you claim tht was white lie. But to me its just a lyrical lie. you think i would place my trust on you agn? Sorry, its time for me to let go. I knw you werent happy at all when you are with me, we shall put a stop to all sufferings. Both of us suffered alot during this 14 mths. Thanks for the blessing you gave. I'll find a better boyf.

Anyw, last night was so woahh. Drink at qb pool bar with jiahao,xiaorick and teckwhye and its totally free :D Thanks for being thr for me whn i'm down.

With love {♥}
Eileen

Thanks for being there :D

2009-04-30T21:14:00.005+08:00

Thanks MooMoo & my friends
today was a terrible day, found out quite alot of things. All along he was lying but at least i found out earlier. Loved, Cried, Forgotten

With love {♥}
Eileen